This has truly been a summer of growth for me. I can’t pinpoint exactly what has been different, as many things have changed. This is my first summer with a job (two jobs even), my first summer actively working with a sponsor, and the first summer I’ve made the decisions and effort to want to grow. Last summer I was sober and in recovery, I was just living out of state with my sponsor still living here in Minnesota, and I was still stuck in a deep depression. With this summer looking up for me a little bit, I decided to take advantage of my heightened energy and more optimistic outlook on life.
Here’s four things I’ve learned this summer on my quest for personal growth:
The importance of not sleeping too much (or too little).
This is a big reason I’m grateful I got hired for the student position in the StepUP office. Upon hire, I agreed to come to work every Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday at 9am. In my years of college, I had been accustomed to going to bed late and waking up even later. I would oversleep almost everyday, and spend the rest of the day feeling fatigued, probably due to oversleeping. It was a very bad cycle to be caught in. Here’s a cool article that supports my thought that constantly oversleeping is not a good thing. But as I realized how much I enjoyed coming to work, waking up at 9am got easier and easier. It also made me get tired earlier, which means every night I’ve been getting about 8 hours of sleep.
The simple task of changing my sleep pattern has changed a lot for me. I no longer feel drained throughout every day, I have tons of motivation to do things I love, and it has lifted my mood drastically. The point I’d want to stress is my increased motivation to be productive and do the things I love. I am extremely grateful for this change in my perspective, which I directly associate with not oversleeping all the time. I’ve also learned, though, the importance of getting enough sleep. I have had nights where I stay up really late and go to work early, on only a few hours of sleep. Those days I spent intellectually foggy, overly irritable, and mostly out of it. Learning to get the right amount of sleep has truly been life changing for me. I know to some it may seem like a simple thing, but anyone who has struggled with depression knows how hard it can be.
The importance of human connection and perspectives on personal growth and happiness.
What I mean by this is, I realized the importance of meeting new people, spending time with an array of different people, and having genuine conversations. We spend so much of the day having quick, surface level conversations, with people we don’t know very well. To me, there is great value inhaving a genuine conversation. On days I have a genuine conversation, I noticeably feel more happy. Seriously getting to know someone, I believe, is one of the most important things you can do in life. Learning about their interests, thoughts, and perspectives, can give you new perspective on your own life. In your mind, all you know is your own story, experiences, and thoughts. But you can open that gate and learn from what’s going on in other people’s minds. Along with this, it has been important that I spend time with an array of people.
I get hesitant to make plans with people I don’t really know, or old friends, because I get anxious when I don’t feel 100% comfortable with a person. I’ve pushed myself this summer, though to hangout with old friends and make plans with new people; even family that I don’t spend much time with. I’ve learned a lot from every person I’ve spent time with this summer. It’s hard and scary for me at first, but in the end it is always a good experience. Every person is unique and has something different to offer. It genuinely makes me happy to learn more about people; it could be a personal thing, but I think that everyone can benefit from getting out of their shell. I also believe that my higher power has a way of working through people, and the more people I’ve interacted with, the more opportunities I’ve had to experience God.
What self-care looks like and how to maintain a balanced approach.
I don’t think anyone has ever told me what self care looks like; not that it has ever been anyone’s responsibility. In the past, I have looked at in a physical way: Self-care is exercising, eating well, and sleeping enough. Then when I would do those things, I would get frustrated when things wouldn’t start to get better. But just recently I read a super insightful article, thanks to Kristin, which explained clearly that self-care is more than physical aspects. It involves spiritual,emotional, physical, intellectual, and relationship needs. After reading, I wrote a list for what MY self-care looks like in each category, because everyone is different.
Overall, it involved things like praying consistently, attending regular AA meetings, spending time alone, spending time with family, exercising regularly, setting boundaries, having a regular job, helping others, etc. Writing it out helped me a lot, because when it was floating around my head it seemed like a bigger task than it actually was. Plus, sometimes I feel “too busy” to be taking care of myself, when in reality I’m really not. Also, having an addictive personality, it has been hard for me to live a life of balance. I either do too much of something (i.e. exercising), or too little. So it’s been important for me to work on my self-care in a balanced way. It’s only been a few weeks, but it’s already started to make me feel a lot better.
There really is so much to be grateful for.
When life starts to get hard and I start to feel down, it gets very hard for me to find things to be grateful for. I have started doing daily gratitude lists with a friend. At first, it was hard for me. As I continued daily with this, it got easier. I started to realize there was an equal amount of bad and good in every situation, and I’ve begun to be grateful for the good. Seeing my friend’s list every morning has gotten me closer to her, but also helped me realize more things that I should be grateful for. It’s important for me to recognize what I’m grateful for because when I’m grateful, I’m happy. And when I’m happy, I can help people more, and I can spread my happiness to others, which ultimately is my goal.
I hope that in some way, my experiences this summer have helped you, as yours have helped me. Thanks for reading!